Change yourself .... change your life !!

I would have been around 14-15 years of age standing in a very crowded marketplace called Aminabaad in old lucknow with my mother buying some stuff. An old man came upto my mother. He had broken spectacles and cudn’t see properly. His look didn’t match with that of the beggars. He asked my mother for some money to buy another pair of specs explaining how his son had thrown him out of his house and now he had no remedy but to beg from strangers. I don’t know whether it was the fact that I have always been very emotional when it comes to old aged people and children or whether he was saying the truth that made me believe him. My mother thought that he was just one of those other beggars and she moved on. I don’t know what happened to me but I cudn’t forget his pleading old face and was overwhelmed to the extent that I had tears in my eyes. I still remember how embarrassed I was at that shop when my mother was showing me a pair of jeans which she thought of buying for me and suddenly tears started rolling down my cheeks. I don’t know why I still remember this stupid incident. Perhaps, the embarrassment infront of the shopkeeper and the face of that old man has etched this incident in my memory for life.

As a child i was always a bigtime introvert and often receiver of compliments from people of being very mature. A girl who'll speak little and think a lot (and a lot means hell lot) about things which matter in life but then things always don't go as you wish them to and who says lifes fair? It has always been unfair to most of us. A girl who'll always do what is right and advise the same to others. Upright, serious kind of a person, always good in studies, someone whose work will always be on time and helpful to others – these things formed part of me. My idea of having fun included only the time spent with my dear friend Shikha who has always been part of my life and still is. Writing short poems, short stories, drawing, painting, sketching were a few of my interests which have faded away as time has passed by.

Then came the time to join college which made my personality take a round about turn. The change was not deliberate but natural. The girl who was crying the day her parents left her in the hostel in college now no more wishes to go home. I nomore take things so seriously as I used to and now believe in living it to the fullest ….. No Matter What. Thinking a lot about others and being so emotional about life fetches you nothing. I guess am more strong , more confident and more mature from before. (though my friends around would love to think otherwise). Life has changed because I have changed and so happens with lots of people in this world… Life always teaches you things in its own fashion… all you need to do is LEARN !